Mama Carrie (Interview in August 1992, Caroline Gray, age 78)

In our not-so-distant past North met South resulting in violent and bitter upheaval. In 1931, North met South again, this time resulting in a marital union spanning 60 years, five children, 9 grandchildren, and 12 great grandchildren.

Caroline Rowland Gray was born and raised in a town called Patchogue, located on Long Island, New York. Her father died when she was two years old and her mother eventually remarried. Caroline’s stepfather owned a shipyard; this shipyard would play a large part in her future life. Coast Guard ships would often dock at the shipyard. Caroline met Ellis Gray when his ship docked there, and courtship ensued. The couple married with the ceremony taking place at her childhood home. Two years later at the age of 20, Caroline left home not to return for 20 years. Her husband brought her to Avon, NC, a town she had never heard of seemingly at the end of the earth.

The newlyweds lived with Ellis’s  parents, Oliver and Mary Gray. They were kind to their son’s bride which lessened her anxiety over her new surroundings considerably. After a few months Ellis bought the old Great Northern Methodist Church, one of two Methodist churches in Avon, and remodeled it to serve as their home.

As a newcomer to the village Caroline noticed things that were interesting to her. The ladies of the village wore cotton sun bonnets with large brims to keep the sun off their faces. She had never seen hats such as these before. And the fences that surrounded each yard had a stile to each side so that neighbors could step up and swing over. The cattle roaming free made a great impression on the young city girl and she was quite frightened of them. In order to visit the outhouse Caroline had to walk down a long path with the cattle roaming all around. One day she was trapped in the outhouse for some time when a large bull decided to approach and linger. These animals also plagued her when she visited her sister-in-law Amanda. The trip to Amanda’s home involved walking from her home in an area called Frog Marsh to another area called Cat Ridge. She would race to the bridge that had to be crossed as this was the only place that the frightening animals were unlikely to be.

The 1930’s found America in the grip of the Great Depression. Suffering was widespread throughout the nation but the villagers of Avon carried on. Their simple lives of fishing and gardening to sustain their families was largely unaffected. Their way of life was rather primitive compared to that of larger towns and cities but they depended on no one to put food on their tables. They took care of their own.

Caroline was very busy in her new role as homemaker.   She and her husband kept a large garden that provided virtually all of their produce. She canned vegetables for the winter as well as drum fish that Ellis caught. The fish was delicious when cooked as a stew with potatoes and salt pork. Washing clothes involved making a small bonfire used to heat water in a tub outside. Lye soap was used to hand wash the clothes which was very harsh on a young girl’s hands. After washing, the clothes were hung on bushes to dry. Sometimes poison ivy would be lurking in these bushes the sap would run on the clothes giving  the wearer a bad rash.

Ellis and Caroline’s children went to school in Avon. Family attended church each Sunday,  both morning and evening service. Prayer meetings were held during the week from home to home. Church activities were an important part of village life and indeed provided their only social occasions.

One of the first types of entertainment to be available in Avon was provided by the men from Pea Island life keeping station. While off duty they would bring movies to the villages and charge admission. In Avon the movies were shown at the schoolhouse and were greatly anticipated by the isolated villagers as a taste of Hollywood.

The storm of 1944 brought disaster to Avon, yet no lives were lost. The villagers had been forewarned of the storm by radio and many gathered in the schoolhouse. As the storm abated and the sun reappeared some men went outside to look over the situation. The sunny and calm conditions proved to be the eye of the storm passing over. The men saw great waves washing from the ocean toward the village. They ran warning everyone to run towards the north to higher ground. One store owner, Gibb Gray, had to take refuge in a tree. He and his cash box made it safely through the storm while his store,  Caroline’s home, and many others were washed off their foundations and distributed along the beach according to the whims of Mother Nature. Soon after this disaster the Red Cross arrived and worked side by side with the villagers to return their lives to normal.

Caroline’s grandchildren call her Mama Carrie and her husband passed away three years ago. The time they spent raising their family were years of hard work and lean pocketbooks but no one complained or in fact seemed to notice. This was the life they knew and loved. Mama Carrie still enjoys gardening, which is evidenced by the lush garden in her yard highlighted by stately sunflowers, some as tall as 15 feet. A few years ago, her granddaughter, Denise Gaskins, persuaded her to try painting as a hobby. Mama Carrie found that she enjoyed painting very much. Her watercolor artwork can be seen at Denise’s gallery in Avon, Gaskin’s Gallery. Mamma Carrie lives a good life surrounded by her family, home, and garden. North met South and this northern girl wouldn’t have it any other way.

(Caroline Gray was born on January 11,1914. She passed away at her home on November 13, 2005, at the age of 91. She had 5 children, 9 grandchildren, 12 great-grandchildren, and 7 great great-grandchildren at the time of her death.)